Children need to be disciplined. As unpleasant as that sometimes is, it is the only way for them to learn the difference between right and wrong behavior. A timeout is a simple method of discipline that teaches your child that their actions have consequences and that they are responsible for their own actions. The child goes a short period of time without positive reinforcement, which shows them that their behavior does not deserve praise, but rather punishment.
A shorter time out may be more effective than a longer one. During a time out that lasts from a half hour to an hour, the child’s mind has time to wander and he or she can forget why they were placed on time out in the first place. Judge the length of the time out by the age of the child. A six-year-old, for example, would get a six minute timeout and a nine-year-old would get a nine minute time out.
Also be careful when choosing the spot for the timeout. It should be somewhere the child can be easily monitored yet left alone for the duration of the timeout. Do not put the child on time out upstairs if you are going to be downstairs. A chair in the corner is an ideal spot for timeout.
You should only use a timeout for one specific behavior problem, this way the child knows beforehand what the consequences of his or her action will be. Pick their biggest behavior problem to work on through timeouts, and then once it is no longer a problem choose a different unacceptable behavior to get rid of. Tell the child why they are being put on timeout as you do it, and make sure they know that you are not punishing them—they are punishing themselves.
Set a timer for the length of the timeout and put it in the same room that the timeout is being held. This way the child will know when the timeout is up and will not have the excuse to talk by asking you how much longer the timeout will be. No one should talk or give attention to the child when they are on a timeout. They are not allowed to play, watch TV, listen to the radio or talk while on timeout. Let them know that any misbehavior while on timeout will result in the timeout being doubled.
The only way a timeout is beneficial is if the child actually serves the timeout. For younger children, giving them to the count of three to get on timeout with the threat of a doubled timeout if they refuse is one way to get them to listen. For children a little bit older you may threaten to take away an activity or possession until they do the timeout.
Timeouts are beneficial because they reduce the need for the parent to yell and they do not teach the violence that physical punishment does. Timeout is a simple way that teaches children to be responsible for their actions, the difference between right and wrong and the importance of self-control.
