If you need a good chuckle, take a look out our humorous, cute, and sometimes sarcastic sayings about children in images. We all know parenthood is a serious business which is why it is so important to laugh about it from time to time!


A two-year old is kind of like having a blender, but you don’t have a top for it.

-Jerry Seinfeld


Setting an example for your children takes all the fun out of middle age.

-William Feather



If your kids are giving you a headache, follow the directions on the aspirin bottle, especially the part that says, “keep away from children”.

-Susan Savannah


We spend the first twelve months of our children’s lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.

-Phyllis Diller


It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawnmower, snow blower, or vacuum cleaner.

-Ben Bergor


Listening to parents’ advice is sort of like watching commercials. You know what’s coming, you’ve heard it all before, it’s a big bore, but you listen anyway.



Children are a great comfort in your old age — and they help you reach it faster, too.

-Lionel Kauffman



Everyone is in awe of the lion tamer in a cage with half a dozen lions – everyone but a school bus driver.



People who say they sleep like a baby usually don’t have one.

-Leo J. Burke



There are times when parenthood seems nothing more than feeding the hand that bites you.

-Peter De Vries

Need more giggles? Here is part 1.

Which of these were your favorite parenting quotes?

If you liked our funny sayings about children, please share them with your friends on Facebook, Pinterest, and Twitter.